I Don’t Always Work When I Am Online

I have a confession to make. It is true, I am not always working on something important or updating my blogs whenever you will see me in front of my computer and going online. And thanks to the advent of a number of social networking sites, my online life which originally was limited to blogging, keeping abreast with the current events here by reading online broadsheets and newspaper, has somewhat taken a life all its own that there are just countless ways to entertain myself whenever I go online. Leaving me with one too many choices and innumerable things to try and discover. Just like when one of my friends confided that playing online bingo  is fun, so who knows I might just try that out one of these days, too!

Thanks to modern day technology, I can now have accessible and inexpensive entertainment right in the comfort and safety of my living room (or depending on where you have got the computer stationed, or if you are using a laptop, you can simply have access anywhere in your house). I can now watch the newest films or the latest TV hit series with just a click of a button. I can also have access to a thousand of books that are also shared online in e-book forms (though I only read once in a blue moon). And, as if all those are not enough, I can always give one of those online interactive games a go. Maybe I can pretend to be a chef for a bit or an angry bird concentrating to hit those pesky pigs, or a warrior in one of those adventure games. Possibilities suddenly became endless and the only limit I can have is my own imagination.

And since the Christmas holidays is fast approaching, I can also catch up on my relatives back home free of charge with the use of online sites that offer services of this kind for free. Truly, the internet and the world wide web is one of the best inventions of our modern times, and I bet you all agree!

Some Problem

This post has been moved backward 13 days as it does. I feel like this has to be done as like this. For what? Seems it is confidential, I guess. Ah! If only I can control more of my time. The husband got jealous of my PC and would not admit that he has problem when he sleep. I cannot control how he used to but just to find ways and means to handle the situation. Okay, this is the first time this matter being written in public. He does not want to let anyone know. I did not tell any of his children as I respect his privacy. I wanted to but then on the other side, it is better to follow his way as most of the time I do that. But this cannot be hidden for long time.  Now is the time. It would be me who got the problem in the end if this continued being hidden. Yes, he dreams most of the time at night now. How could I sleep that way? This was already when we were in bf-gf relationship but I never thought it would be as bad as this. Now it gets worse. What I do is that I made and make sure I have a lot of energy and always awake at night so I can hear and observe what he did/does. And I even made a video of him once and showed it to him as he didn't/doesn't care and believe it. Ooh well, he showed some way just like wrapping himself sometimes through his blanket but it never as always like that all night long. What I did/do is (I'll just make this as present tense though it is what I did in the past too) I just go on PC and do my blog thing and sometimes goes on facebook website just to see happy smiles on pictures of my virtual friends to entertain myself at the same time I can earn a little on my blogging e-sponsor. Now, that is his problem because he wants me to be with him on bed which I do and goes to PC after he fall asleep. I proclaim myself as his night guardian which he do not want to, he hates when I said that. He cannot accept the fact that he is not on his mind when he's dreaming. Not only just talking but more on action and shouting as if he has enemy and wanted to punch, kick and stuffs like that. One time I had a little bruise on my face near the eye as he punch me. Another time was on my hip side. Well, blame it to the dream and not him. I can do nothing when am tired so what I do is that morning is my sleeping time. The thing is he does not want to go to doctor. We (or most of the time it is only me) just a self-study how to solve it. I wanted to have another bed as when he fall asleep I will just sleep on the other bed as he could not directly do something while he is dreaming because am a bit far from him especially when he face on me while we sleep. The thing is we just have a small bedroom which could only occupy one bed. I wanted to sleep on the floor but he does not agree or even sleep at the couch. Ooh God, help me! He's starting to get mad at me because when he wakes up in the middle of the night or dawn time (hours before he got up, he got up at 5 am) I was not there with him. He could not understand the fact that I am guarding him when he's asleep. Ooh God help me with my major burden. I have many minor burdens too but that is nothing compared to this as he is my other half. As I am writing this, I am thinking if he would wake up and am not there in bed. And he would be mad then. Huhu. :( I have to be there now. Thanks for reading. Through this, I feel a little comfort. Thanks!

I Won, I Won! Yey!

Not only the first prize but also the consolation prize which it is only intended for US bloggers only. What a lucky me! Whew! What a happy feeling it is. Until now I still cannot believe it. About three days ago (yes, it is just now I posted this though I was so meaning of posting it but only managed to answer the comment I saw of my sweet blogging sistah Kayce and about a day ago, I posted on my main blog: Cacai's Steps and Journey) Te Grace of Amazing Grace of her contest, Amazing Grace Amazing Contest, sent me my winning 50 bucks. Along with such winning is two domain with web hosting good for one year from Mommy Rubz and told me lately that it could either be for wordpress or for blogger platform. I am glad it can be for blogger too as she is a domain and web host angel for wordpress. Nonetheless because she said it could be, I guess with our "marz" power. Hahaha! But oops, she said it's gonna be fine so that is all what counts. Also I won 5000 Entrecard credits with that prize (so $50, 2 domain with hosting and 5thou EC credits plus consolation prize good for who's blog came up from random (dot) org drew which the latter winning was being drawn 22 hours ago). Actually the contest winners were being determined through random(dot)org draw. What a lucky day huh! I then tweeted it and shouted in Facebook too! I was just happy, who wouldn't?! ;-) By the way, the consolation prize is five pieces of lip gloss which I so love to have. I already tried that lip gloss (a combination of lip stick and gloss) and I actually have two which I use it currently, I just love it. I can then give it as my "pasalubong" to my close relatives for our vacation plan soon (hopefully before this year end). ;-)

"Now, am unlucky no more" I could tell to myself as I am unlucky of contests or giveaways when it comes to raffles way. It gave me phobia of joining it unless I put on my mind that won't ever win such. But as I said "am unlucky no more", it just proves. :-) This is my first online contest winning by the way and unforgettable. Diary, keep it in memory. It may not as big for you but it matters to me.

In The Bathroom (Muahahah)

Silly me! This is what a wife could do sometimes before going out, yes taking pics! Well, if not you at least me muahhahah (Laugh Out Laughing -- LOL). :-) It was also a chin zits moment as you can see. Waa!

One sunny afternoon in the midst of July 2010, I thought I did not had any pictures for a long time so I took a picture of myself! Ha! Ooh well, that time I felt like I want to have a remembrance of one of my happy day. Oops I was about to go to the post office that time and at the same time one of my brisk walking moment. Since in our bathroom is the last corner I go for a mirror, I just grab my mobile phone and took some shots. And here it went. Oops diary, pardon for the messy comfort room, this also why I had to took for remembrance of our messy one. Ha! Do not be scared of that silly blind-alike woman below. The last image told, "bleeh" haha!

The week before the weather went up approximately 103 degrees Fahrenheit. Am just glad it passed-by already but I do not know what is the humidity forecast for next week. I hope it is just like this week, the highest is 86 degrees Fahrenheit.

So then, have a great day! Enjoy the sunny season with an extra care. ~hugs~

Don't Have The Drive To Write

Sometimes I do not have the drive to write as in I have something to and need to as well but it is because of my bod drama and its sense. As much as I love to but unfortunately it just don't come up. Whatta day! (LOL).. I am doing this just now to flip it off trying to have something and push if there's gonna come out from its place. I hope so... Hemmm... I have my monthly visitor and all I like to do is sleep and eat... waaaa... This is opposite this time since mostly when days like these, I like to do things and even like to indulge myself into water just like washing some clothes through hands though it doesn't need it here because there is washer and dryer, it remembers me the time since I washed clothes through hands then water spilled unto my feet or on my dress. That was not fun but it was part when I did my washing and rinsing. Ooh well... those were the days... yet I still like to do washing on-hands nowadays when washing undies and sensitive clothes or stuffs that just bought. Yep, technology really makes our works easier to manage and I like that fact. We have choices what we do to our stuffs just like to wash it through washing machine or by hands, dry it through dryer or just hang traditionally and many others. Don't you like the scenario that we have now choices? Okay, so now I have the drive to write.. *winkz*... Have a great Monday folks! Enjoy what you are doing...

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Got Weak

I was about to be sicked of cough and cold but thanks God I wasn't really. I felt so weak three days ago and I just let it relax through a lot sleeping and drinking a lot of water for two days. If you could see I can't manage to write here but thankfully (as well), I dropped some love to those favorite blogs of mine though I was not feeling well. Hubby cooperate and just let me did the lazy bug and the luxurious sleep. I am happy with my life now because I can do whatever I like and want with the permission of my husband with the precautions and limitations no wonder I gained weight.. (LOL)... Anyway, one day ago I got to talked to my dear mother (so long that we haven't communicated) and my sisters. I was glad then because she cooperates. Oooh well she knew that they had a lot to catch up with me, my mother actually. T_T. And so, we talked for some serious things and ended like she want some bucks.. (LOL) Okay, I will give her because she is my mother behind all the long-time no communication because she got married again. We parted in many years and I managed to look for her year after I graduated in college for some questions and stuffs like that. You know... or if you don't know, ask me then.. :-) By the way, I got weak after we talk because I have some task to do with them. Urgh.. Okay, that's life after all they are one of my family.. confusing eh? Could I shout, "Who Dat?"... seems like I am thinking on New Orleans Saints team shouting "hoorah!" after winning the first time in Superbowl. I got weak and at the same time somewhat like happy with Saints.. (~_~)...

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Beginning Today

Beginning today, I have to free up myself from worries. I have to keep sane all the time. I have to keep my priorities and set aside the nonsense. Nonsense are still good but priority first. So far, I got the answer on my questions already. Wow, why I was usually absent-minded when it comes to family topic? Ooh well, I was lost that time. I did not know who to trust. I cannot blame myself because I was taught to be independent but knows the woes of the peeps surrounded me and that I could not stop. I was afraid that if I trust them, they will be in control of my life if I trust myself in them. I have my own life before I came to them. Where are they when I needed them? I can't force myself but to trust my instinct. It's been hard to teach myself with myself's idea. I have to differentiate the bad and the good without someone to guide. Well, there are may attempted but sorry I was determined on my ability (hey I got awards from my first grade up to my higher years and that's what I believe in -- my strength). And now I have to free this up. I won't afraid anymore. I am capable already because I got what the meaning of life is. This doesn't mean that I changed negatively. Everyday is a change for the better and there's a lesson I can get whether to get rid of some or to keep it. I am thankful enough that many thought of me as capable of something and I adore such. It is always in my heart wherever I am. It's just that I need some space that time which I thought there's nothing and I wasn't wrong. I encountered a lot of struggles and trials in life and I could say I am now a better person. No hatred and other negativity just gratefulness. I have to do the optimistic way to go on my life. It's only in hoping and being optimistic that we can go on with our life. Just be confident and that's it. I was thankful (until now) that I still had my life after all the struggles and difficulties. Well, that's life, struggles first then fruits of labor afterwards. I know confidence isn't that easy to get but if you were at it, hold it tight and never let it go. And hey, do you believe in the saying, "Forgive but don't forget"? Ahhh.. what about "Forgive and forget"? Hmmm... the one who read this of which I will have to say this to the concern knows. Ahhh.. forget it? :-)

Now I believe that "action and words will accompany with each other", do you believe that? This quotation is from my own experience. I do not know if somebody who is famous has quote it but I believe I haven't seen one but this doesn't mean that I am mighty-- it's just that it coincides to what I felt and experienced. There are times that it's either action or word but I believe serious talk is the answer since trust is where it leads. Trust is the best powerful word but could also be worst. Then conscience came in if ever the other party will break the trust. Conscience is the highest form of weapon towards a sensible person. A highly educated person who has fear to God Almighty has it. Be happy because everyone deserves happiness! Give yourself a break or should I say be happy in whatever you do. Strive to love whatever work you go into. I guess that's the secret of happiness. Happiness can be seen at the end of the struggles but it's better to experience it as the plot flows since you never know if you can get what you are striving for. What I am trying to emphasize is it's better to be happy and cool every now and then and at the same time strive hard the long-term goal but don't expect so much in it. If it will be given to you, then fine, if not then fine too, right? Well, this is just my opinion and everyone is subject to it's own opinion and I will stick to this idea (based upon my experience so far). Whew! It's great to be optimistic and living in an honest simple life. (~_~) Thanks for this, I am able to voice out! Diary, please keep them in your memory. I am happy and I deserve it, right? :-) Ahhh... :-) period. :-) .. seriousness :-)

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